When you’re young, you do like some almighty guff. Saved by the Bell: Hawaiian Style springs to mind as something that seemed very good at the time, but was in retrospect not exactly high art. The rise of the High School Musical franchise has shown that tween girls are a commercial force to be reckoned with. However, there is a limit to the crap they will take, and based on the audience reaction at the showing of New Moon I attended, the filmmakers are close to that limit. Many scenes were so cheesy that this very young audience just burst out laughing.
It doesn’t matter that New Moon has a terrible script, seriously iffy acting, and that the pacing is shot to hell, though; people will still watch it for two reasons. Firstly, it’s based on a tremendously popular series of books, like Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings, so people will be happy no matter how long and boring the films is, eager to see each beloved scene spring forth from their brain and onto the screen. Having a hit in this situation is fool proof, unless you cast Nicole Kidman, of course, in which case people will run away screaming (cf. The Golden Compass).
But they didn’t cast Nicole Kidman, they cast Robert Pattinson, the second reason it will be so popular. All he has to do (in fact, all he does do) is stand in the background and look moody, and the audience laps it up. That is until he takes off his top to reveal a pale torso and strange chest hair, when a collective ‘Ewwwww!’ was expressed from the crowd of 12-year-olds. Not the reaction I expected. Luckily New Moon has the added tween-girl-catnip of Taylor Lautner, a 17-year old who must have been stuffed full of protein shakes like a foie gras goose to produce his new rippled physique. His shirt is always off and the audience approved of his torso.
Following on from where Twilight left off, the film opens with Bella (Kristen Stewart) still madly in love with her vampire boyfriend Edward (Pattinson). But she is very worried because Edward is eternally young and she is ageing. Then Edward leaves her for a reason that is never explained, and she goes into a deep depression. Only her friend Jacob (Lautner) and his amazing abs can cheer up Bella, and he turns out to be a werewolf.
In a film with many problems, the main one is Bella. She is a whiny, characterless girl who when not moping is either bumping into things or putting herself in mortal danger. She has friends but doesn’t like them, no hobbies or interests and nothing to say for herself. Following her progress is like walking along a dark tunnel for a few hours with only a small light at the end of it, which turns out to be a rushed and very strange finale in Italy that wasn’t worth the trip.
The glimpses of Robert Pattinson’s eyes and Taylor Lautner’s fascinating new body are all the film has to recommend it. The Saved by the Bell summer special was really genius in comparison and about ten times more fun.
Thursday 26 November 2009
Tuesday 17 November 2009
Sunday 15 November 2009
Review - The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus
This film has been very eagerly awaited, both because it includes the final performance by Heath Ledger, and because it was rumoured to be a return to form by Terry Gilliam. The positive buzz pre-release was that Lily Cole’s mesmerising and sensitive performance would launch a new star. In reality, the film is a confusing and heartless mess, a fantasy for fantasy’s sake with any deeper intended meaning lost in a sea of swirling CGI.
Doctor Parnassus (Christopher Plummer), a mystic of uncertain and ancient origin, travels through London in a decaying carriage cum sideshow stage with his band of misfits, including his beautiful daughter Valentina (Cole). They put on a show in which people go through a magic mirror to be confronted by a phantasmagorical landscape of their own minds (I think; the film is not very clear on this point). Unfortunately, it turns out that Parnassus is an inveterate gambler, and long ago he promised the soul of his daughter to the mysterious Mr Nick (Tom Waits), who we can only assume is the devil.
Into this messy situation drops Tony (Ledger), a man in a white suit who has lost his memory. It is very unfortunate that this had to be Heath’s last role, as any acting is completely drowned out by a terrible accent. Jude Law, Johnny Depp and Colin Farrell (who fill in the Tony-gaps left by Ledger’s death) are all so much better at doing an English accent (unsurprisingly in the case of Law) that it is slightly embarrassing to watch. Tony’s character and motivation are very unclear, but by the time the final big fantasy sequence arrives you really don’t care why everything is happening or how it concludes.
Cole is also very disappointing. Undeniably unusual looking and definitely intelligent, still at times her performance is very amateurish, with clunky phrasing and a faraway look in her eyes. Costumes do most of the work for her. On a positive side, Plummer is gruff and lovely as Parnassus, Verne Troyer gets a speaking part and is quite funny, and Andrew Garfield is exceptional as Tony’s rival for Valentina’s heart. I’ve only seen him in the dreadful Red Riding thing on telly, so it was nice to get a second chance to like him in this Puck-like role.
The best way to survive the film is to not think and just swim around in Gilliam’s mind for a bit. If you stop to consider what’s going on, you’ve had it, because there is not enough magic to sustain an inquiring interest. The use of CGI is the main culprit. Gilliam always had a rather DIY aesthetic, which made his work seem like that of a troubled Victorian. The lavish costumes and sets mostly convey this, but when people go through the magic mirror, they end up inside a level of Katamari Damacy and the charm disappears. Less computer involvement, a clearer story and real emotion (something which his masterpieces The Fisher King, Twelve Monkeys and Brazil included) would have made all the difference.
Doctor Parnassus (Christopher Plummer), a mystic of uncertain and ancient origin, travels through London in a decaying carriage cum sideshow stage with his band of misfits, including his beautiful daughter Valentina (Cole). They put on a show in which people go through a magic mirror to be confronted by a phantasmagorical landscape of their own minds (I think; the film is not very clear on this point). Unfortunately, it turns out that Parnassus is an inveterate gambler, and long ago he promised the soul of his daughter to the mysterious Mr Nick (Tom Waits), who we can only assume is the devil.
Into this messy situation drops Tony (Ledger), a man in a white suit who has lost his memory. It is very unfortunate that this had to be Heath’s last role, as any acting is completely drowned out by a terrible accent. Jude Law, Johnny Depp and Colin Farrell (who fill in the Tony-gaps left by Ledger’s death) are all so much better at doing an English accent (unsurprisingly in the case of Law) that it is slightly embarrassing to watch. Tony’s character and motivation are very unclear, but by the time the final big fantasy sequence arrives you really don’t care why everything is happening or how it concludes.
Cole is also very disappointing. Undeniably unusual looking and definitely intelligent, still at times her performance is very amateurish, with clunky phrasing and a faraway look in her eyes. Costumes do most of the work for her. On a positive side, Plummer is gruff and lovely as Parnassus, Verne Troyer gets a speaking part and is quite funny, and Andrew Garfield is exceptional as Tony’s rival for Valentina’s heart. I’ve only seen him in the dreadful Red Riding thing on telly, so it was nice to get a second chance to like him in this Puck-like role.
The best way to survive the film is to not think and just swim around in Gilliam’s mind for a bit. If you stop to consider what’s going on, you’ve had it, because there is not enough magic to sustain an inquiring interest. The use of CGI is the main culprit. Gilliam always had a rather DIY aesthetic, which made his work seem like that of a troubled Victorian. The lavish costumes and sets mostly convey this, but when people go through the magic mirror, they end up inside a level of Katamari Damacy and the charm disappears. Less computer involvement, a clearer story and real emotion (something which his masterpieces The Fisher King, Twelve Monkeys and Brazil included) would have made all the difference.
London Film Festival review - Sweethearts of the Prison Rodeo
Oklahoma hasn’t entered into the collective consciousness much since the days of the Dust Bowl (the terrible bombing of 1995 being an unwelcome exception), but the state has been quietly building up one of the highest incarceration rates in America. Weirdly, it has about twice the average female incarceration rate. Who would have thought that this largely rural state would be locking up its women like there’s no tomorrow?
Also, who would have thought there was such a thing as a ‘prison rodeo’? The Oklahoma State Prison Rodeo has been running since 1940, and is one of only two left. In 2006 they let women prisoners compete for the first time, and this documentary from Bradley Beesley (director of the fabulous Flaming Lips film The Fearless Freaks) follows the girls (and one guy) taking part in 2007.
Like all the best documentaries, it will make you laugh, cry and feel like you’ve come away just that little bit more aware of the world and the amazing people in it. Added to the heartbreaking stories you’d expect of a film set in prison, you’ve got the unique spectacle of Bull Poker (which is just as sensible a sport as it sounds).
And the stories are heartbreaking. Most of the women are mothers, and the pain of separation from their children hangs heavily on their shoulders. Jamie, a murderer with a tiny little-girl voice, has had such a hard life, and Foxy hasn’t seen her family for 12 years. These are by all accounts beautiful young women, yet we know that they have done horrible things. Danny Liles, the only man featured, has taken part in 14 rodeos and has so far served over 20 years for murder. His philosophical musings make up some of the poignant moments.
Underlying the human stories is a deep uneasiness about the ‘war on drugs’, which has put most of the women in prison. But there is no moralising here. The thrill of watching bronco riding or people being gorged by bull horns in the film’s climax is secondary to the thrill of seeing hope for a better life in the future. A wonderful documentary.
Also, who would have thought there was such a thing as a ‘prison rodeo’? The Oklahoma State Prison Rodeo has been running since 1940, and is one of only two left. In 2006 they let women prisoners compete for the first time, and this documentary from Bradley Beesley (director of the fabulous Flaming Lips film The Fearless Freaks) follows the girls (and one guy) taking part in 2007.
Like all the best documentaries, it will make you laugh, cry and feel like you’ve come away just that little bit more aware of the world and the amazing people in it. Added to the heartbreaking stories you’d expect of a film set in prison, you’ve got the unique spectacle of Bull Poker (which is just as sensible a sport as it sounds).
And the stories are heartbreaking. Most of the women are mothers, and the pain of separation from their children hangs heavily on their shoulders. Jamie, a murderer with a tiny little-girl voice, has had such a hard life, and Foxy hasn’t seen her family for 12 years. These are by all accounts beautiful young women, yet we know that they have done horrible things. Danny Liles, the only man featured, has taken part in 14 rodeos and has so far served over 20 years for murder. His philosophical musings make up some of the poignant moments.
Underlying the human stories is a deep uneasiness about the ‘war on drugs’, which has put most of the women in prison. But there is no moralising here. The thrill of watching bronco riding or people being gorged by bull horns in the film’s climax is secondary to the thrill of seeing hope for a better life in the future. A wonderful documentary.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)